"Ma'am that tea wasn't made with water." was my shift supervisors calm and polite response.
"You have GOT to be kidding me! This is ridiculous! This is made with WATER! See how light it is! I said N.O. W.A.T.E.R.!"
(At this point the woman had the attention of everyone behind the counter. And was getting a few jaw dropped looks from other customers).
"We can remake it for you if that would make you feel better? It really isn't a big deal."
"NO! I said no water! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DRINK THIS?!"
The awkward, anger provoking conversation continued for a few more moments before she stormed out of our store.
Anyone who works in a restaurant, business, or really anywhere that has human interaction knows the feeling, all to well, of people flying off the handle and taking out frustration on you or a coworker for no apparent reason.
This story though for some reason has just stuck with me these past few days since the incident. I know it may seem dramatic but I really haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
It is an amusing story to think about and retell...but in that moment..I was so mad that someone would talk to another person like that over black tea. BLACK TEA! Its less than $4.00 and she was acting as if we had stuck a lobster inside of a cheese cake.
As I think about it I realize there is more to it sticking with me than it being funny or being ridiculous..There are obvious lessons I took from this.
1.) There is much more to what is happening in her life than this black tea.
Whether that be family trouble, financial trouble, health trouble I don't know... I do know one thing for sure and that is that it wasn't just water in black tea that caused that reaction...it was what was happening the hour before, the day before, the week before.. there is more to peoples stories than the 5 minutes I interact with them.
2.) You can tell people to calm down if they are being a little crazy.
I, towards the end of the conversation, went up to the woman and told her to hand me the tea so I could throw it away if it was that big of a deal, but suddenly she decided she didn't care that much and left. Honestly I think she would have kept going if no one said anything. Now that doesn't mean I was going to be a jerk to her...but just because your day is rough doesn't mean you can take it out on people you don't know. (especially my friends dang it!)
3.) How you communicate is everything.
If she would have simply asked if the tea had water and asked us to remake it there wouldn't have been a situation...but because she was yelling and demanding answers it made everyone in the room feel less inclined to help her.
Above all of those great reminders the one that sticks out the most is this,
People don't remember what you say, they remember how you make them feel.
Honestly I don't remember what that woman said specifically and I am sure that the person she was yelling at doesn't remember exactly either...but I know I remember every emotion I had in that moment and every feeling I had for the next hour.
If I were to see her tomorrow and take her simple order of a black tea with no water I would instantly become frustrated and annoyed and not want to make the drink because I will be expecting the same reaction as the other day. I know it seems crazy but it's true.
Now. Let's compare that to 6 shots, 5 splenda, 1 pump vanilla, light ice, extra carmel drizzle lady. Probably one of the most RIDICULOUS drinks we have to make consistently... but I love making her drink. I would make her drink 10 times a day if I could.
Why?
Good question it takes about 5 minutes to make and is just so obnoxious...I don't love it because I am challenged to make something different....I love it because EVERY TIME this woman comes through the drive through she really acts like she cares...She makes you laugh, says jokes, has real conversation, asks questions, answers questions....she is just someone that we all genuinely enjoy when she comes through.
I am not saying "Don't ever let your emotions show and be fake all the time!"
What I am saying is I constantly am reminded that I don't want to ever be a drain on those that I am around. I want to people to enjoy being around me and have fun when I am around and be someone that can honestly say that life is hard but I CHOOSE joy daily.
Everyone gets frustrated and stressed...how do I respond in those moments?
